Old Mexico

i have decided to stop trying to figure out the perfect way to present the trip. i am going to share it with you the way it felt to be there and the way it feels to look back on it now - like a big whirlwind of fun and laughter and friendship. oh, and tequila.

this trip really was one of the best weeks of my life. it made me so thankful for my friends, for every experience was enhanced just because they were there to share it with me. it also taught me a thing or dos about hospitality, as genevieve's family not only opened their homes but also gave us the gift of their time and education and most importantly, new friendships. at times i felt like one of those travelers who stumbles upon a cottage on a cold rainy night, and the master of the house let me in and gave me dry clothes and porridge. except in this case the porridge was chiles rellenos and churros and jamaica. i will forever be grateful for the amazing experiences they afforded me. us. i mean, the amazing experiences they afforded us. here are some of them:

-ordering margarita's at harry's in san miguel de allende during the 3-for-1 happy hour, expecting that we would each get one margarita and only be charged at the 3-for-1 price -- but instead we each got 3 a peice!! we had 12 margaritas on the table at once, and that certainly started us off on the right foot...which we were hardly able to stand on by the time we left.

-having bob, the owner of harry's, pull my skirt up just to get a better look at my "porcelain, no platinum" skin that "could maybe cause him to fall in love with me" but that definitely caused him to send over some complimentary mini-burgers. he knows the way to our hearts, and it ain't through sweet talkin'.

-bonnie's finding her long-lost twin in pat, a 60ish fort worth-via-ohio-divorcee who is moving to san miguel as we speak. bonnie knew she found her kindred spirit when pat said, "well i got to the door & it wouldn't open and i was like FUUUUUCK." and, "girls, have y'all met mearle? now that is one funny white woman." bonnie + pat forever.

-sleeping in the open, fresh air of san miguel. well, lying around in it for 3 days straight, sick as a dog. and having g go to the pharmacia to explain there was an alien baby in my stomach that was preventing me from eating or drinking for several days (unacceptable where there is a homemade chile relleno in front of you, beckoning you to eat it and just suffer the consequences) and having the pharmicist get very serious when she says, "make sure she takes all of this medicine - or else."

-walking the cobblestone streets of san miguel at sunset, and catching glimpses of pink sky behind handmade alters to the Virgin de Guadelupe.

-discovering that my "w" handsign for "weave wednesday" can be inverted for "weave miercoles!" (this also works with "whatever, main" but you better have some serious street cred to rock that one.)

-meeting a chichuahua named "bebe" that dresses in coordinating outfits with her tits owner.

-convincing lalo, our driver, that g had gotten drunk in san miguel & had married the first hot guy she saw, only to watch the color drain out of his face at the thought of his loss.

-being in df on the 50th anniversary of frida's death. in celebration there were banners with her works hanging outside of bellas artes and an entire frida exhibit that was designed by her neice. it was amazing to finally see one of her works in person, not to mention all of the actual photos of her life. but later realizing that we only saw 2 of the 4 rooms in the exhibit...

-deciding that chile en nogada will be served at my wedding, it is that damn good. and a margarita, can, in fact, be improved if it is a margarita de jamaica.

-introducing bonnie to cajeta. we may have created a monster.

-and speaking of, the girl loves pan dulce like it is sprinkled with crack. i have never seen someone so giddy over bread.

-driving through the streets of df with 83-year-old kathryn as she yelled out the car window, "oye jovenes - cual es mazatLAN?" (hey kids, where is the street mazatlan?)

-asking a table full of americans what they like best about mexico and getting this in response. "oh, the people." "yes, the mexicans." (as we look around and realize the only mexican is in the kitchen in an apron) "well, the mexicans who work for us." "servants. definitely servants."

-finding $400 pesos on the ground! chauffeur money!

-realizing that little bitty lalo, the driver, thinks that bonnie's name is pony. and having him say to me, "mira a pony. ella es un chica grande, no? mas como un caballo, no un pony." (look at bonnie. she's a big girl, right? more like a horse than a pony!!") PONY!!

-enjoying a fantastic massage, and for 1/3 the cost of a massage in the states. even if she did warn me of an impending digestive problem even i didn't know was coming at the time, which she discovered through reflexology in my feet. and oh, the joys of cupping!!

-determining that even when one of your friends squawks for 10 days about how she's afraid y'all are going to be big sluts in mexico, that squawking doesn't apply to her, especially when juan manuel is fucking hot.

-and bonnie's delicate spanish assessment of the consequences of aforementioned whoring, "mis amigas are nunca going to let me live this down!"

-trying to explain the phrase 'hardcore' to hot juan manuel - you can be hardcore into tennis, you can be hardcore for pamela anderson, extreme walking is hardcore - and having one of his friends pipe up and say, "but really, you can be hardcore for your green card!"

-realizing that genevieve really is a bestia when it comes to tequilla shots.

-visiting la casa azul and standing in front of frida's 4-poster bed that she was famously carried in through the streets of mexico city and looking at the death mask that contains her ashes and feeling overwhelmed by her presence, so much so that i actually cried. (and the subsequent disillusionment at finding out everyone noticed every time i cried on that trip, as they listed off all the times for me, one by one.)

-knowing that bonnie & i are a comfort to g, and hoping she realizes how wonderfully, amazingly, terrifficly bad ass she is, and it's not just when she's in mexico.

-having chile en nogada for a second time because, hijole! it is so good.

-experiencing an old mexican folk remedy of having the skin lifted off my spine - and hearing it crackle. and let me tell you, gringos, it worked.

-hearing a mexican attempt to understand genevieve's name. "you mean, genevieve, like tel aviv?!"

-closing down the roof-top bar in df at 4 am, as groups of mexicans wait to see if they can take us dancing. en fuego, we were!!

-telling two gorgeous, rich, mexican women that the previous weekend my family had told me "it's okay if you are a lesbian. we all really like bonnie." and having them reassure me that i do not, in fact, appear to be a lesbian. they'll even call their sons to get us dates tonight, just to prove it.

-amazing chilaquiles and nopales juice in the morning. i should start every day like that.

-having one last brush with death in the cab on the way to the airport, cause bonnie had been covering her face & squeezing my leg all week long; why should she stop now?!

here is the link to the entire photo album if you'd like to see all the photos internet!